leavin' on a jet plane... (again!)
Empty on the inside
Shining on the outside
I get lost sometimes
Blinded by the flashing lights
Distractions always in my eyes
So i'm following the sound, the sound of my heart
You can take it all away
I don't need it Beating
Underneath, i'll still be the same
You can take it all away
You can take it all, take it all away
I don't need it, it's not me I'll still be the same
Time can turn it around
Don't you want to love yourself?
Are you hiding still?
Don't you know that someone will?
That's the only way to find it out
Leave it all that's dribbled down
Are you following the sound, the sound of your heart?
Beating
Coming in with nothing, leaving with the same
You can take it all away
I don't need it Beating
Underneath, i'll still be the same
You can take it all away
You can take it all, take it all away
I don't need it, it's not me I'll still be the same
Coming in with nothing, the only thing that saves
It's all inside
Is here inside
Ryan Cabrera - Take it all away
yoz..leaving for Vietnam in a few hours time. Argh... its a kinda dreadful feeling having to leave home again... No christmas nor new year for me. *sobz*.. Hoping to spend some quality time with my family though. To everyone else... here's wishin' you all a MERRY X'MAS and a HAPPIE NEW YEAR!!!
To the top of the world and back
During the short four days of my disappearance, I've been to the top of the world and back down... Finally after all that hype from my parents (who happen to my adventure junkies too!) and a little gentle persuasion from some of my fellow odac mates who happen to be considering the trip, I made a last min. decision to sign up for the trip.
Scaling up the mountain was a whole new experience altogether since I was never climatised to such heights, my lungs and heart had to work doublely hard to pump enough oxygen into my blood. Hence most of the time, light-headness and difficulty of breathing were my worst enemies. Every step up the never-ending flight was like squeezing the life out of my thigh muscles...at one point of time I thought they were gonna BURST! As we ascended higher up into the clouds and mist, the air naturally became thinner and breathing became a chore, my limbs felt like lead and I had to stop every now and then to rest my fatigued muscles.. But I pressed on with the guide right in front of me... took me 4hrs to Laban Rata Lodge at 11 000ft.. one hour ahead of the rest. My God..should I have known I wouldn't have pushed myself so hard!!!Thank goodness for my two fellow companions Hui Juan and Hui Fang who followed closely behind.. after which we allowed our photowhoring nemesis take control... GROOVY shots!!!
Thank You God for making this wonderful world... and for opening my eyes to see your beautiful creations.
Here's a collage to summarise the whole trip. I'VE CONQUERED MOUNT KINABALU!!!
the birthday episode
Yesterday, (as put in Shengrong's words) was an affair of wholesome fun. Went out with the family and had dinner at our all time fav waraku jap restaurant. Hadn't had such a great time with them in such a long time. It was all smiles and laughters. Baby joined us for dinner as well..and i must say he was a wonderful addition to the family*woops*..haha. Oh yesh..I MUST tell you about the present i got from my family!!! Guess what I got?!?! the ROWENTA LISSIMA IONIC HAIRDRYER!!! HURRAY!!! the whole family was involved which made it even sweeter. Money from Dad, seeking of information done by mummy dear, and darling weiquan went down all the way to tangs to get it for me! and even got it gift wrapped.. gosh..I can't stop gushing! but i was seriously pleasantly surprised. Thanks guys... oh and not forgetting Kor, he wrote me a card..tt was sweet.. thank you for the valuable advice bro!
then after... mummy dear had a sudden craving for the apple tart from bakerzin. so...we scuttled over to the branch at bakerzin. Baby and I shared a ice-cream waffle which was delectable..crisp waffle lightly soaked in strawberry paste and a dallop of ice-cream over the top. Yums!!!
now..time for another miracle... midnight shopping at marina!! woah..went insane! gosh, think i have had too much to buy these two days. Purchased 1 dress, 4 tops and a pair of shoes in a matter of hours... My goodness.. its the sales i tell you. they corrupt you and lure you into doing these things! i'm innocent... *pout*.. but nvm, i was one happie shopper. hehe.
midnite striked..it was my bdae!!! the family serenaded happy birthday to me in the car on the way home. It was hilarious...haha. Thank God for my family... they certainly are the joy of my life.
Just when i thought tat the already magical night had come to an end, baby emerged at my doorstep with a card and what else? sunflowers!!! my fav! *muackz* love you loads baby...
je t'aime mes fleurs!!!
baby reading the instructions....
its mine!!!
to the ignorant few out there...
CUT THE CRAP!!!
note to the IGNORANT few out there:
Its the 16th December today and it is SIHAN's 20th BIRTHDAY!!!!
happie birthday to me..
happie birthday to me,
happie birthday to sihan,
happie birthday to me!
*pout*
I was down my dreams were wearing thin
When you're lost where do you begin
My heart always seemed to drift from day to day
Looking for the love that never came my way
Then you smiled and I reached out to you I could tell you were lonely too
One look and then it all began for you and me
The moment that we touched
I knew that there would be
CHORUS
Two less lonely people in the world
And it's gonna be fine
Out of all the people in the world
I just can't believe you're mine
In my life where everything was wrong
Something finally went right
Now there's two less lonely people
In the world tonight
Just to think what I might have missed
Looking back how did I exist
I dreamed, still I never thought I'd come this far
But miracles come true, I know 'cause here we are
Tonight I fell in love with you
And all the things I never knew
Seemed to come to me somehow
Baby, love is here and now there's
Two less lonely people in the world
And it's gonna be fine
Out of all the people in the world
I just can't believe you're mine
In my life where everything was wrong
Something finally went right
Now there's two less lonely people In the world tonight
p.s. please stay tuned for more updates for the birthday...
rude awakening
Heck it all... soon i was in lala land again...*snooze*
Je suis TRES fatiguee...
Made Butter cookies for Baby today. Hoped he liked it...was meant to make up for all the 'weird' behaviour from me this week. But doubt it worked... Bah..
Went out to have dinner avec mon petite ami in town. Then we headed to St James Power station for the launch party of powerhouse coz I had two special invities via sms. The place done up pretty nicely, a pity the crowd wan't too excited. Party spoilers...BOO!!! went around the building exploring..saw a handful of celebs... and we came to a conclusion that St James Power House is a BIG MESS!!! Hehe. Oh well, still a nice place to visit for novelty's sake.
curse the period
I named it by the way... haha
Anyway, it was a hit with my little bro. Funny becoz given that his love for vegetables is what you would call vacuous; and the fact that the dish was laden of the 'potent' stuff, cauliflower, carrots, tomatoes, garlic and what not. My mother was laughing in glee as she scooped bowl after bowl for my bro... *phew*... you have no idea how hard it is to get my brother to eat his veges, what more to take a liking for it. WAHAHA. Looks are deceptive... guess it must be the nice camouflage provided by the pretty blanket of melted parmesan cheese and juicy tender chicken cubes... *drooling*..hehe.
Yeh... got striked pretty bad today. The cramps..the aches, the sores springing up on every single known muscle on my body. Damm... curse the period, curse womanhood!!!!
btw, here's my favourite quote from casino royale.. if u guys ain't catch it yet..PLEASE go watch it! its tres tres bien!!!
"Just a moment. Three measures of Gordon's, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet. Shake it very well until it's ice-cold, then add a,large thin slice of lemon peel. Got it?"
Damm..he has all the pretty bitches huh...
Oh yesh...Here's a reallie belated bdae greeting going out to ollie!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! hehe.. 8th dec rite? Sorrie..was a little caught up with work. *Bleah*..Hope you're having great fun in York.. remember to bring a pretty black guy home for me to see!!! HEHE
lalala...life is fair
Maybe i'll feel better tt way...
*yawnz*
Dessert: Strawberry lemon pie (i learnt to make jam from scratch today!!! by trial and error coz i cldn't find the strawberry puree in the supermart. haha)
Sides: Steamed Mixed Vegetables
+ Red wine...
Anyway, its my birthday in a few days. *bleah*..still no plans yet. (Dazed look) Can't be bothered reallie. Its just another birthday. Only an occasion to 'celebrate' myself getting a year older... a year closer to my death, is that in any case a good cause for celebration.. NAH!!! dun think so... heh.
Just recieved invites to the launch of St James Power Station. Looks kinda exciting... quite intrigued by the structural design of the place. Shld look pretty awesome with its 5 storey high ceilings...Hmph. maybe i shld go check it out sometime.. Also got invites to the lauch of The Clinic..which has been the constant rave on class 95. situated at the cannery... the website is erm..how do describe it.. Weird and neurotic. Very strange indeed. Haha.
Orite..gotta go to bed now... apparently stubborn baby refuses to go to bed without me going to bed at the same time. *bleah*.. ORITE..COMING!!!. Au revoir.
to see a face staring back.
A face I want to see closer,
a face that I lack.
I apply the eyeliner smoothly,
and lip gloss like a river.
under this makeup I bury,
my feelings I never deliver.
And the face that smiles back at me,
is a face that is unknown.
For the girl I show everybody,
is a girl who's always alone.
RAT race photos..
teams playing card games with the station masters at settlers cafe (holland v)
caution: gamblers at work
want a taste of our EXOTIC cusine in the mystery bowls?
Teams at the last checkpoint at esplanade
SMILE everybody! (happie participants at the finish line...)
too bad i'm too lazy to upload ALL the photos on.besides there are TOO MANY!!! haha. Yep. Also, didn't manage to capture some of the activities at some checkpoints like ford factor, xiao guilin, bedok reservoir and east coast park bowling alley. So you cld imagine how FUN the race was.... YIPEE!
kk..too round it all off on a sweet note..lets not forget the Babes in the spot line..WAH LA!!!
tts all folks!!!
Race against time!!!
So after the first station, I was sent to Bedok to unload the kayaks as well to settle the other logistics. Yet again another panic-ridden experience as we met with some other crop ups like a delay in the arrival of teams due to heavy rain..and even our lorry breaking down in the midst of transportation of kayaks. Sigh..the waits were long..and accusations and mistakes were rampant... But then again, I agree that the strength and organisation of a team is only truly revealed in the face of unexpected events. Its the ability to face up to these challenges and stand together that defines a good and capable team.
Following this, I went to my station in charge which was at toa payoh safra. Challenge was simple, 2 pple from each team to climb 2 seperate walls. the straight wall, if you are unable to scale to the top would result in your team incurring a time addition of 30mins and the other wall, if you are able to scale to the middle and touch the grip (above the overhang) would result in a time deduction of 20mins and further scaling it to the top will allow another 10mins deduction on top of that. EASY huh..wait till u see the wall!!! haha..kudos to all those participants tt managed to scale the wall. YOU'RE GOOD!!! heh. and many thanks to my wall crew from pumpfest for helping out with the setting up of the wall and the belaying of contestants. Munir, Kelvin, Aaron and Zhenhan..xie xie ni men. Had loads of fun goofing around wit u guys.
Though the whole race was mistake-laden mostly due to the miscommunication btw the logistics and the programmers side. I felt that the race was a mini- success..and the efforts from everybody was commendable considering the short amount of time we were given to pull this race together and the appearance of the exams right smack in the middle of all our preparation. As they say, what doesn't kill us is only gonna make us stronger. Lets have faith that all our mistakes we make now will serve to be our lessons learnt and tt we may not commit them once again in the REAL race..ATC! ~jiayou everybody
favourite pic of the day... Zhenhan and Smelly Ben-Ben
goodnite everybody...
the princess needs her beauty sleep (which she seriously lacks now..) *Yawnz*..
Busy as a bee...
Shed the clothes that become my skin;
See the liar that burns within my needing.
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.
How I wish I had screamed out loud,
Instead I've found no meaning.
find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say,
but I'm not here for trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.
Help me understand the years.
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.
How I wish I would save my soul.
I'm so cold from fear.
I guess it's time I run far, far away;
find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.
but apart from all the work..there's always time for fun!!! so it was off to dbl o last nite. Guess its true that Aero pple aren't much of club go-ers. They just aren't warmed up to the idea of getting yourself high on booze and shaking your booty on the dance floor. Its just illogical by their standards. Oh well, perhaps that's why i'm considered one of the stupider one in the course. Gosh, and now the truth comes clean...
So i was dancing with serene and pingting... and i realised tt I was infact surrounded by couples.. couples entangled in each other. Kissing, touching dancing..as though they were submerged in a world of their own, oblivious to the onlooking stares. I was jealous. Suddenly I felt so lonely. Guess it has been quite some time that I've gone clubbing with my gfs and not my bf. All of a sudden I missed him...
Karen...the bimb-bitch??? hehe
innocent lovin'
We went to watch casino royale today. Which was an absolutely FABULOUS show!!! i kid u not.. the action involved in the movie is very different as compared to the usual bond movies which focused more on the high-tech gadgets. In this movie, it show cases Bond as a cold-hearted killer, highly capable in terms of closed arm combat, speed and strength. His tolerance of pain is highly admirable in the movie as he 'gets his balls scratched' by the evil, sadistic bad guys. Overall, it was a good movie which had a high worth of entertainment value. A MUST-WATCH even for the masses who aren't die-hard james bond fans.. like me. tee hee.
Kk..enough of all the sweet talk already. Gotta cut loose all the angst inside of me... Was outraged today by 'somebody'. Gathering from my character, impulsive and rash, i get irritated easily. therefore approximately 1/2 a day from now, I won't hold and grudges anymore. So spare me for the vulgarities and the crude language that I maybe spouting in the next few lines...
She said: "Don't spend too much of Melvin's money lar"
WTF!!! i mean..Its not as if I dun have my own money to spend? DO i look lyke some sort of money-sucking machine to you... GOD NO!!! pls..i ain't some cheap, materialistic girlfriend that clings onto her boyfriend for branded goods and whatsoever okie? pls DO NOT EVER think tt of your daughter. I DO NOT beg melvin to buy me stuff.. he just does becoz he loves me. is that fine with you?!?!? GOD....
then she makes matters worst by standing outside my door and going on and on..squeaking about how i run to her only when i have problems and then treat her lyke shit when i don't need her. God....what did i do to deserve this..*whining*..
Save me from myself please...
my impatience... my downfall
My impatience, My tendancy to get irritated easily. My extreme mood swings that with the touch of a button may swing me from the highest of heavens to the pits of hell. My frustrations, My insensitive being. My rashness. My indecisivness. My insecurities... all these..my vices..my weakenesses..i'm ashamed by them, gripped by them. They pull me down, drag me around. My simple mind put at the mercy of these vicious creatures tt seem to assume a life of their own. growing to enormous sizes..towering over the goodwill tt liveth within. I wish i can break free... then I wldn't have to hurt so many pple in the midst...
Public apology to Melvin:
Baby..i'm so sorry for our recent squabbles. I knoe its just me...i'll blame it on myself.. Clearly i've been rather impatient and hot-headed recently. I can vouch tt this is not derieved from my frustrations from my dissatisfaction of u, coz u're simply the best i cld not ask for more. Rather, its just in my nature tt i be all of the above. I never meant to hurt you reallie..but its inevitable.. for tt i'm deeply apologetic. hunnie..pls forgive me alright? I still love you..and this silly gurl here is silently hoping tt u'll still love her...
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
the race...
The only thing that was on our side was the weather which fortunately was cool and breezy. However grey skies overhead and the slight drizzle gave the event a sort of dreadul feel to it. Pass the 30km mark, looking around, the roads were quiet..with just the soft patter of footsteps from the competitors and the occasional shouts and cheers from onlookers. I was intrigued by the idea that below the peaceful surface, the thoughts and determination in these runners minds prevail. Their silent struggle against fatigue, pain...and their admirable mental strength to pull through. Though the runners run seperately, there was a secret bond amongst all. The common desire to reach the finishing line burned strongly in each of them. Indeed the mind can be a powerful tool..
some more pictures...
the end is finally here!!! + Vivo
little boi playing in the pool..awww..ain't he the cutest thing?
Oh goodness..after all that trudging up and down the packed corridors, my feet got kinda tired..haha.. told u the place was GIGANTIC! haha..so me and baby left for a better place.
ice-cream galore!!! it was heaven on earth... haha. the daily scoop being located in the very secluded neighbourhood of clementi offered a fresh alternative to the many other popular and more commersialised ice-cream parlours present in our shopping complexes. They focused on using fresh ingredients to derieve new and queer flavours that u wldn't usually find elsewhere. Personally i would recommend the lychee martini (which packs a punch..so beware), the bailey's chocolate chip (this is really really good with a strong dash of baileys which so happens to one of my most favourite drinks! haha)..But then..we tried out the other flavours. Baby had hazelnut haven with waffle and I had ginger crumble with brownie. It was indeed a perfect pairing..the ginger crumble tasted authentically of fresh ginger meaning the 'la' flavor was there with every bite. Yums..a bit queer but it was really refreshing..
okie... some bad news. tomorrow's the standard chartered marathon. Reallie scared considering that I haven't been training up much for this event. And fact is... its gonna be 42.195km!!! NO JOKE man!!! So all I hope for is to cross the finishing line in one piece. THats all I ask for...